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First three chapters of my book: Grey Water, promise me my freedom.

1 Of course, it is one of those things that is always around us, carrying with it among the most prominent fuels of our being. Yet, you barely notice the air when stationary. The train it is different. The train moves at such a velocity that suddenly - everything is subject to change. I look outside through the cracks in the timber and watch the world as it filters in and out of existence. Trees, mountains, tracks, vast divides altogether real enough to touch, are suddenly morphing into hazed mirages. I no longer have any way of knowing if they were, are or ever will be, entirely real. Such a burden is the knowledge. How my hair becomes sticky with existential dread.                I first boarded the train some two or three hours ago. Since then I have remained nestled between the mail bags. May you be concerned as to how I have not moved. It is true my limbs have begun cramping in this stiffened position. Oh ...
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The funny thing about Australia, is that the gum trees still grow through the cracks in the concrete.

My Father’s father crossed the vast seas dividing Italy and Australia by boat. When he stood upon deck it was for months at a time that he would stare across the dividing liquid wastelands, crystal blue and lapping at the hull – an expanse that can sink this ship but does not sink this ship. I was raised in a family that loved me. Really, truly, madly, deliriously. So much so that I saw the far reaches of this world, long before I was near old enough to know what they meant. We boarded the ship that would carry us off the coast of Queensland, so we could cruise between the Pacific Islands, I would stand between the hot tubs, or perhaps under the wide screen TV’s, or sink into some forgotten corner of balcony space. I would look out over that same barren wasteland and think how it might be possible that we have as little means of survival at sea as we do in our hot deserts, yet we are fool enough to claim them opposites. My grandfather does not think like this. My mother and I can...

A Brief History of Me

Sometimes I go to the house at the end of the street and sit there for hours, picking at the wallpaper. It flecks off piece by piece and no one knows that I’m the reason why the house looks like that. No one believes that I could have done it. I make tears big enough to walk through. I have no need for them, but I hold them up to the light and watch them flake away from themselves. Weathering around the beams. Soon this will all be nothing but a skeletal structure. A picture of a lifetime. The finest thing you have ever seen . ­­ I draw a match to my tiny hairs. I glow in the light, for as long as I can bare it. I couldn’t tell you what’s changed. I couldn’t tell you why instinct says was, instead of is. Why I won’t be beautiful anymore when I’m all glacial and melting. When it misses me. When it comes back to me. It waits in its comfortable silence to see how I will react because it doesn’t want me to be afraid. But I am afraid. And ...

Under Construction

The first time I went through our doors I was carried. The house was then a literal skeletal structure, bare bones, exposed foundations and frames in need of not a fresh coat of paint but every coat. I imagine before I was born there was no end to the similarities that could be drawn between my existence and this house. Possibilities wrapping around the foundations as the skin and cells coiled around my body. Personality and character simmering between the air in the rooms as I slowly became someone within myself, and little revelations in a finger or floorboard allowed us both to slowly take form.                        Having a baby is a big step. For my parents, I was no longer an idea or a concept, I was a person. They didn’t have any time left to prepare, there was no going back, I was here and I would be for a very long time. Looking around at the house we were in just...

Happy Song

They said darling let’s sing a happy song They said Come on, won’t you sing along? I said Why would I sing a happy song? When everything is going wrong? They said come on let’s write a symphony I said How strange it seems to me That we would dance to this melody sowed and throws in anarchy Hear the birds, hear the reeds dripping honey and melody They are Not what they seem to me They are Not what they seem to be Though flicking buttons in the dark Go pearlescent when they start to spark you’re determined To leave your mark caring not what becomes of you Judgement burns through and fair kind disposition and poison air It was your hands That drove us there Understand Bruise and care Come on let’s sing a happy song They can’t save us From where we belong They can’t save you You’ve been gone to long Singing a happy song and behind you, is your battle field save me, guide me, be my shield Refuse to y...

Freedom Song

Freedom Burning on my skin Wayward faces steeped in sin are escaping me Freedom Graywacke hells all sing while nestling shells all ring up against the sea Speak with me at salty sea oblivion Be with me on the borders of anguish and time Reach for me Through the thick of cries and tricks of minds in gaps in peeling plaster on prison walls Freedom While liquid silver fails and shines avid rivers walk the line between you and I Freedom I am waiting Constantly pacing anticipating and knowing of you Freedom All I ask of you In all that you do Send it through the wind Freedom Dancing in holy light Master the dream and fight Seethe and strive and divides us I believe in a stone through In places that felt in winds that know In layers of concrete that crack to give you sand How easy it is How easy I find How easy to give and lose you mind And all that I have, for a chance to understand ...